Two all beef patties…special sauce…what’s your name…??

It just so happens that my short-term memory is non-existent. Today a lovely neighbor told me that at the ripe ol’ age of 38, I must surely have Alzheimer’s. God blessed her with the gift of “bluntness.” Her and I get along great.

Does anyone else remember the old Wal-Mart jingles? “Come to Wal-Mart…for savings you can see…everywhere you look, everywhere you go……..” Or how about the birthday cake you received at the age of 3? Double layer round vanilla cake with white frosting, topped with plastic smiley faces. ūüôā It was previously frozen and picked from the freezer of the grocery store that used to be called “Country Boy in Mansfield, Ar. I ate it on a round , wooden stool at the bar of my grandma’s house and it tasted fake. Do not try to figure out what that means,¬†¬†¬†Just. trust. me.

I have a great memory! It freaks the Big Injun out. I start singing jingles from the 70’s and he gets irritated. Why? Because surely if I can remember those things from over 30 years ago, I could remember what the movie was about that we watched the previous night. But , I cannot. I am not kidding. This is not a one time situation. It’s never. Ever. T-total, utter blankness. I cannot tell you what it was about,¬† nor the name of it. I am famous for renting Red Box movies we have already seen. Good thing they are only a buck.

This is only one example. Today I met a new neighbor, she told me her name. I forgot it,  no kidding, within 2 seconds. I had to ask her what it was before I left again. I felt like a big, fat loser. Then I had to repeat it to my daughter and tell her to remember it by the name of one of her friends that shares the same name.

Can I really¬†blame this uphill battle on the lack of short-term memory? I would love to. But upon examining myself lately¬†and trying to change in areas that were birthed from the spawn of satan himself… I have concluded something.¬† And¬†albeit it ugly, ¬†I am going to come clean –¬†¬†I… <gulp> … ahem… well…¬†I do not pay attention….

What a relief. I feel liberated. Re-newed.  Perhaps, a fraction lighter. But can I still say one thing?

¬†We had two channels growing up. Our T.V. was on a tripod and you had to turn it on with tweezers. Good thing I had a sister because once we got the power on, one of us had to go outside and turn the GARGANTUAN antenna on the corner of the house until one of us would beat on the window or yell “STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”¬† We then proceeded to watch a couple of shows on our snowy channels and that was it. We did not¬†rent movies. The only movie we watched were the Disney Movies that came on Sunday nights. My favorite then and to this¬†very day was and is¬†Willy Wonka &¬†the Chocolate Factory.¬†¬† I can name every character and every scene, sing every song and never tire of it.¬†¬†¬†I did not have video games, nor did I have the distractions of¬†this world. I paid attention because I had very little to pay attention to. Life was simple. And I could remember things. Now I am old(ish) and I have 400 channels and approximately 700 fast food chains to choose from.

What I really wish is that I had a huge antenna¬†on my house¬†a fake tasting cake from Country Boy- along with¬†a movie that I could remember tomorrow. But in the meantime, I am going to make a better effort to pay more attention, ¬†but i’ll probably just forget to do it.

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Categories: funny, Uncategorized


I am Rachel. I have a skewed sense of reality and I like to live through my imagination. Unfortuntely, that has taken me down some rocky roads and I am here to share some snippets of what happens when a girl has a mind of her own.

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5 Comments on “Two all beef patties…special sauce…what’s your name…??”

  1. harrythehandyman
    March 10, 2011 at 11:05 am #

    good blog and content but could i give you some help as recommened in the forum , Categorys and tags cannot be the same , such as funny and funny also the total both both should be a total of 9 to 10 , the search engines do not like what i have just wrote about , also you should install the ” read more ” button into your posts its easy and the visitors dont have to scroll for ever . you can see it in my blog and others , just trying to help , harry

    • March 10, 2011 at 11:10 am #

      Harry, thank you so much! I appreciate the constructive criticism and I am going to go work out the kinks now ūüôā

  2. harrythehandyman
    March 10, 2011 at 11:36 am #

    ok no problem , i’m just looking around here and theres no way for me to get back to the home / front page

  3. March 10, 2011 at 11:46 am #

    Ok, I went and fixed them, but I do not understand what you mean by getting back to the home page? I see the home page just fine when I click on “Mixin’ It Up: Goulash Style? I do appreciate you helping me.

  4. harrythehandyman
    March 10, 2011 at 12:21 pm #

    got it now ūüôā

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